Uplevel Your Love Life with Spirit-Led Dating

Dating lessons from spiritual matchmaker Heather Kristian Strang

BY Heather Kristian Strang

ith more than a reported* 44 percent of the United States population single and more than 40 million souls engaged in Internet dating, the thought of re-entering the dating world can make one’s stomach turn. So many people, so many options, however can one choose or be chosen?!

Fortunately, my single friends, I have very, very good news for you.

Dating can absolutely be a magical, miraculous journey filled with discovery, healing, joy, and deep, meaningful Love.

It merely requires that you abandon every rule you’ve ever given yourself or followed about dating, choosing instead to nestle yourself deeply into the quiet of your connection with your Higher Wisdom—Source/God, Angels, and Guides—so that you can be led with ease to your next Divine Love unfolding.

I like to call it Spirit-Led Dating.

In Spirit-Led Dating you completely let go of the tips on how to “get” the guy/girl, how you are “supposed” to look, the things you’re “supposed” to say, what you’re “supposed” to write on your online dating profile, etc. All of that becomes irrelevant.

Instead, you turn the whole notion of dating on its head to get really clear about what dating truly is. Because here’s the thing: Dating as we have culturally been indoctrinated to understand it is completely unnecessary, and actually counter to the way we were meant to live!

Shopping for a partner that our Spirit already knows exists and is already set up for us to meet? Writing down lists of compatibilities and trying to figure out who you should “choose”? Whatever for? Stick with me here, let’s dive a bit deeper.

The purpose of dating, at its root, is to come together with someone we feel deep, joyful, love-filled, and meaningful connection with, and if the alignment allows, to then co-create a life together in some format (either through cohabitation or a marriage or commitment of some kind).

But what if you knew with absolute certainty and clarity that this other, this individual that you will consciously choose and who will consciously choose you, is not only out there for you, but that the entire Universe has conspired to bring you and this one together—for Love, for healing, for joy, for peace, for the co-creation of something truly extraordinary?

What if you knew that searching was unnecessary because life was already set up to bring you two together? What if you knew that you two had been circling each other unconsciously as each of you grew and developed to come into alignment with sharing a life with one another?

I have great news for you once again: This is exactly how it’s all been set up.

Literally, the entire Universe has been designed to bring you two into each other’s lives, perhaps for a lifetime together (depending on your Soul’s agreements and intended path).

I get it, it sounds far too amazing to believe. Except—except it’s actual Divine truth!

How do I know?

I’ve not only experienced it myself in my own life of being in spiritual partnership, but I’ve watched as my clients—now over a thousand women—have had these same successful intuitive dating experiences over and over again.

It works something like this: You feel like the job you’re in and the community you’re living in is no longer aligned, so on a “random” whim you follow, rather than resist, a nudge to apply for a new job in a new town. You get the job like lickety-split, much to your amazement. One month into the job you go to the sister company’s office and as you go to shake a man’s hand you are meeting for the first time, you hear a voice say, “You will marry this man.” Crazy thing, he hears the same voice too.

Two months later, you’re married.

That one happened to me.

Or, like one of my clients who received guidance in one of our sessions to let herself be led to a metaphysical store to purchase a very specific and rare crystal. When she followed this guidance and let her intuition lead her to the metaphysical store (not even located in the town she was living in!), she met a woman there who said she “knew” who the woman’s partner was. One week later an introduction was made and she embarked on a new relationship with this man.

Or, you finally realize your long-lost dream is to live in New Zealand and you decide you’re done waiting for life to do it for you—you’re going no matter what. You mention this new decision to a close friend who realizes she knows one person in New Zealand. A man. A man you might actually like! She introduces you both and, BAM! You’re now living with this man in New Zealand, just bought a home together, and are building a beautiful life with one another. That happened to one of my friends; and yes, I was the friend who connected her to the man!

You see, here’s the thing: Life is always, and I mean always, trying to get you to where you’re most aligned. To the people, places, and things, including relationships, that will serve you so that you can be the most You that you came here to be.

It doesn’t mean this man or woman will be the “forever” partner. I thought when Spirit said to marry that man, it meant forever. It didn’t. It meant until I was in the exact placement I needed to be for my spiritual awakening to occur, and then said man informed me that he didn’t want to be married anymore—and so, off I was, whisked to the next unfolding of my life adventure.

The partner will stay for however long will serve the both of you—sometimes that will be the rest of your life, sometimes that will be three months or three years. These are the aspects of which we are not fully in control and to which we must surrender. Our job? To show up fully for Love. To lean into Love, no matter what. To use everything that occurs in that partnership (especially those aspects that really trigger you) as fuel to become the magnificent being you are here to be.

And then, he or she either falls away or rises up to be your lifetime partner.

Spirit-Led Dating, just like Spirit-Led Living, is meant to be a fun scavenger hunt where you follow the next sign and the next sign that leads you to the unfolding that will deliver to you exactly what you need, and will—at the Divinely-aligned time—put you in a partnership with the person you spend the rest of this lifetime with (should that be your desire).

Spirit-Led Dating

Spirit-Led Dating Strategy 101

With this expanded understanding that you needn’t run amuck like a chicken with your head cut off searching and looking for your partner, here’s my recommended Spirit-Led Dating strategy that I encourage all single Souls to follow for optimal life and Love fulfillment:

  • Let go of all dating rules and regulations, self-imposed or otherwise, and replace them with this affirmation: “I only do that which I am guided to do.” Meaning, your only “dating” rule is to follow your intuition, synchronicities, and miraculous signs that will point to your beloved partner. You may be guided to an online dating site. You may be guided to a matchmaker. You may be guided to go to a park on a “random” Sunday. You may be guided to a new class. In these moments, listen to your gut and go!
  • Keep your intuition clear. For this divine guidance to occur, your intuition needs to be clear, and intuition is only as clear as you are. Make it a priority to keep your energy field clear, meditate regularly, and do anything else you’re guided to so that your intuition can be on point. Otherwise, your fears/traumas/limiting beliefs will be the filter your intuition runs through, giving you guidance that is less than accurate. And that’s just annoying!
  • Remember in dating anything is possible, just like in life. Most people are skeptics who have created an endless amount of limiting beliefs and fears all culminating from previous heartbreaks—usually linked originally to heartbreak with one or both of their parents, which is linked to heartbreak from other lifetimes. These stories and limitations you put belief in greatly hold you back from experiencing true and lasting Love, and that’s why regularly reminding yourself that anything is possible is vital. Your Love story isn’t necessarily going to look like anyone else’s; be open to all of the delicious and miraculous ways that life works to bring true Love to you. Make limitlessness your mantra.
  • Work to release all blocks to love. Make your #1 focus for your dating life to let go of and release all of your barriers to receiving Love as opposed to “I have to go out and ‘get’ my person/relationship.” As the wise Rumi told us, “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”You are at your root already Love. Who you really are, knows who your Divine partner is and is doing everything it can to nudge you in that direction so your Divine alignment with this one can take place. Instead of scrambling around to “find” this one, align with a healer, therapist, spiritual guide, or any practitioner that has experience in this arena and whom you feel a deep, Soul resonance with. As these barriers to love are released, as your intuition becomes clearer, and as you follow all of your intuitive guidance and nudges about where to be and what to do and where to go, what I call Love Miracles begin occurring.
  • Make the exploration of life your biggest priority. This looks like taking that pottery class you always wanted to take, or going out dancing, or trying new restaurants, or visiting your favorite one for the thousandth time, or taking that road trip you’ve dreamed about forever, or walking along the beach more, or meditating and connecting into who you really are more of the time, or hugging strangers and leaving love notes in bathrooms! What am I trying to say here? Say “yes!” to being the Light that you truly are by experiencing life in all of the ways you are guided to.

When you follow the above intuitive-based dating strategy, you begin to experience a more magical life unfolding. Not magical in the way that it comes from a wand and a fairy godmother, but magical in the sense that you can feel the support of All-That-Is, you can feel your ancestors cheering you on, you can feel that you are living in alignment with who you truly are. And as you live in this alignment, there is no end to the mysterious and synchronistic and beautiful ways that life leads you to what has already been Divinely set up just for you. It simply takes full participation in your life’s journey and your commitment to living as your most authentic self.
Do you have a similar Spirit-Led Dating success story? Share with me below in the comments!
*Data: Statistic Brain Research Institute from February 22, 2017, https://www.statisticbrain.com/dating-relationship-stats/

Want to learn more about Spirit-led dating and sacred partnership? Check out our guide The Truth About Love.

Heather Kristian Strang

Heather Kristian Strang

Heather Kristian Strang is an author, spiritual guide, matchmaker, mystic, medicine woman, and intuitive. Her books include Live Like You’re on Vacation (out November 2017), Ecstatic Union with The Divine, A Life of Magic: An Oracle for Spirit-Led Living, The Quest: A Tale of Desire & Magic (currently optioned as a film), Following Bliss, And Then It Was You, and Anatomy of the Heart: Love Poems. She has written for and been featured in Bustle, Elite Daily, The Huffington Post, Elephant Journal, FinerMinds, The Oregonian, Portland Monthly, the book Fierce on the Page and on the cover of the Sedona Journal of Emergence. Learn more at HeatherKristianStrang.com.

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